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Who can get laid first? Since she's married and I'm single I just have to find some one to make out with... guy or girl!

I saw something on here about the lines guys use... or something. then I found this on funnyjunk and thought I would share

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?

Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.



Man: Is this seat empty?

Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.



Man: Your place or mine?

Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.



Man: So, what do you do for a living?

Woman: I'm a female impersonator.







Man: Hey baby, what's your sign?

Woman: Do not enter.



Man: How do you like your eggs in the morning?

Woman: Unfertilized



Man: Your body is like a temple.

Woman: Sorry, there are no services today.



Man: I would go to the end of the world for you.

Woman: But would you stay there?



Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.

Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing

I grew up with novaxstarr. Her older sister and mom are really good friends with my dad her name is also Jenn she was always Jennifer dyann and I was Jennifer Michael…middle names

ManniQueen: its not funny to us when people say Hey Jenn and we both look. Shes 6 years older than me, and she introduced me to the 3rd Jenn... you get the idea and silverfangs, lol we were together so much we answerd to each others name than you wanted to know huh

I read this and thought of you, considering your probably gonna be a con artist when you grow up ;)





4 High School friends meet at their High School Reuion. Then the fourth Highschool dude goes to bathroom and the others start to talk about their sons...



Highschool Dude 1: You know my son? I'm so proud of him 'cause he was so successful. He became so rich that he gave one of his best friends a 2-million dollar Mansion for free!



Highschool Dude 2: Really? My son's made me proud to. He's became so rich from acting and gave his closest friend 2 free Hummer H2's.



Highschool Dude 3: Even my son got rich to. He won the 8 million-dollar Lotto and he bought his friend a private yatch and plane.



>>The fourth Highschool Dude comes back from the bathroom and overhears them talking about their sons. So he began to tell them about his son.



Highschool Dude 4: Yeah, well, my son hasn't been as successful like your sons have. He's gay and works at a gay stripping joint for a living.



Highschool Dude 1: Sucks for you.



Highschool Dude 4: No, not really. He lives in a 2-million dollar mansion, owns his own jet and yatch, and owns 2 Hummer H2's which were all given to him by 3 of his Ex-boyfriends